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Sex tips for a man to pleasure a woman (page 2)

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Hints for giving great cunnilingus to a woman.

Start licking somewhere else and teasingly work your way towards her vulva. You could start on her nipples, for example, or lower down her legs, and work your way towards her clitoris bit by bit. When you get nearer, just let your tongue or lips "accidentally" flick lightly over her sensitive areas, perhaps breathing warmly onto them as you pass by so as to give her a taste of what's to come.

Lick her thighs, moving upwards towards your target slowly, but each time you reach her clitoris, lingering a moment longer to let her savor the experience.

Eventually she'll begin to move her hips or thrust slightly, a sure sign that she's ready for closer and more intimate contact.

Take this as your cue to focus your attention on her clitoris, and begin to lick around it, across it, down her labia, up her vulval slit, and into the entrance of her vagina. Keep a rhythm going, to provide consistent stimulation which will help her build towards her orgasm.

Picture illustrating a woman's external sexual organs

Understand her sexual drive varies from day to day.

A woman's sexual cycle depends on her hormones, which in turn determine how much she desires sex and how sexy she feels. If you're in a long term relationship, you could keep a chart of her cycle and her sexy periods, so that you know when sex is most likely to happen. But in general, the sexiest times are immediately before and after her period.

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Understand what turns her on.

First, she needs to trust you. This not necessarily the same as being relaxed - it means having a perception in her mind that she is safe with you. Clearly, the more intimate you are with each other, the safer she will feel, and the more likely she is to be aroused. You can find out what she likes over time - some of the things will be obvious (romance, skillful lovemaking) but her specific turn-ons may be harder to identify - for example, many women love to see their man ejaculate powerfully, and find it a real turn on. She's not likely to tell you such things until you know her quite well.

Know that your penis is not your most important sexual orgasm to her - that honor goes to your mind.

Unfortunately, it's true: while you may adore your penis, and play with it every time you get the chance, she is likely to be much more holistic about sex than you, and she'll probably be rather amused by your apparent penis-obsession! That doesn't mean to say she won't appreciate your penis - it means she will want to hear you say loving things, to feel the touch of your hands on her body, and to sense your love for her - as well as wanting to caress and play with your penis when she's horny! 

Be a bit of a tease.

When something feels good - as judged by her reaction to what you're doing - back off and try something else. So if you're licking her clit, say, and you sense she's getting really aroused, try breaking off and licking her nipples instead. Such interruptions can make her orgasm even better when it finally happens. (Warning: if you try this when she's too near orgasm, she may not be very  pleased.)

Remember that continuous stimulation is necessary for her orgasm.

Unlike you, when she's getting near orgasm, she will probably just want you to continue stimulating her clitoris at the same pace and pressure. At least, that's what she's likely to tell you, but in my experience, when she's very near the point of orgasm, a little harder and faster stimulation often helps a woman get over the edge. I think what is clear, though, is that when she moans with pleasure in the beginning and middle stages of her arousal, it's definitely not a signal to you to move your fingers faster and harder!

The other important point to recall is that if you stop stimulating her when she goes into her orgasm, she will stop coming. The process isn't like the male orgasm and ejaculation, where, once it's started, you can't stop it. For her, clitoral or G-spot stimulation all the way through her orgasm is needed to keep her pleasure going.

Picture showing the location of the G Spot

Your penis can be used to play with her clitoris.

Of course you'll want to stimulate her clitoris with your fingers, and probably your tongue, but don't forget that you can also use your erect penis to gently bang (not bang, just tap, really) her clitoris and vulva. She's likely to find this very exciting. 

Anal play needs a little bit of thoughtful planning.

You may be more into this than she is, or vice versa, but in either case there's a good way to get around any reservations you may have about the hygiene issues. Simply use a latex glove to cover your finger, lube it well, then finger her anus until you or she wants more action in her vagina, at which point remove the glove in one swift movement and discard it!

Or, if you're into penile penetration, cover your penis with a condom, then remove it once you're both anally satisfied and you can then either switch to condomless sex or put another condom on to enjoy the penis-in-her-vagina routine! There are many sexual positions for anal sex which you can see here.

Get some technique before you play with her clitoris!

As you may already know, her clitoris is a lot more sensitive than your penis. At least, it ought to be! It has twice as many nerve endings in a fraction of the area of your glans, so it can't really take much direct stimulation until she's pretty aroused. Though she'll soon tell you if you get this wrong, the way to avoid being too intense too soon in your lovemaking is to circle her clit with your fingers, and alternate periods of this movement with periods of running your fingers up and down her labia or her vulval opening, teasing with your fingertips just inside the opening of her vagina.

Picture illustrating how to hold the labia while stimulating your partner's clitoris

Lubrication is essential to making clitoral play a success - your saliva is very adequate for this purpose, though you'll need to keep adding more. Eventually, you can slip a finger inside her, though if she doesn't respond to this, or her vagina isn't well-lubricated, you may be jumping the gun, and need to give her a bit more clitoral pleasure before you go back in.

As far as oral sex is concerned, if she's giving you the pleasure of her mouth on your penis, the least you can do is return the favor. If she's worried about her taste and smell, then lots of reassurance may be needed - and if she is indeed a bit whiffy, why not take a bath together before sex and provide her with some non-allergenic, pH balanced soap (which won't irritate her vulva or vagina)?

Tact is essential here. There's no reason to say anything about her body in a way which might hurt her, and though some women are very matter-of-fact about it, others can be shamed by being told that they could be fresher in the vaginal department. You can always get around this by asking her to join you in the shower making a point of soaping your penis and balls, while telling her that you are doing so in order to be as fresh as possible for her pleasure! She'll soon get the message.

You can learn all about anal sex here.

Strawberry sex

And of course it doesn't have to be a strawberry. You can put slices of fruit in or on your partner and enjoy the extremely erotic sensation of eating it off her body. If she's willing, try eating it out of her vagina.

Beach sex

If you're on a secluded beach, you might want to try woman on top sex, perhaps with a sarong or towel to hide the most explicit parts of the act.

Sensuous baths

She'll love you for preparing a sensuous bath with aromatherapy oil like Ylang-Ylang, a very sexy perfume for a woman. While she lies in her warm, oily, candle-lit bath like a queen, massage her feet gently and sensuously, to delight her senses and give her a taste of the erotic pleasures to come. (Such as, perhaps, oral sex and body massage.)

Two nipples are sexier than one!

If you're giving her pleasure on her breasts, such as when you're teasing her nipples for a long time during foreplay, remember that her pleasure will be greatly increased if you stimulate them both at once: one with your tongue and one with your fingers. 

Sex tips for her to pleasure him! Click here!


More sex tips for him to use on her

Penile pleasure for him (2)
Tips for him to please her (1)
Tips for him to please her (2)
The Female Sexual Organs
Penis-Vagina Sex Imaging

Other pages on the penis and testicles

Best sex positions
Fellatio - what women think
Better sex and masturbation
Pleasing a woman in bed
How To Satisfy A Woman In Bed
The penis & male pleasure
Premature ejaculation
Extended orgasm for men (1)
The senses in lovemaking
Arousal and desire
Fetish and fantasy
Sexual behavior
Intercourse with a soft penis
Men's sexual needs
The power of the penis
The nature of masculinity
Male sexual massage
Manifesting Your Reality

Other sections on the site

Penis information & penile facts
The penis, masculinity and sex
A Cultural History Of The Penis
Penile & Other Problems